Do Not Depart

Encouragement and Tools to Abide in God's Word

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Parenting is Not for Wimps!

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The door slams immediately following the eye roll and huffing.   And once again I’m left wondering how we got from, “Will you bring me your dirty laundry?” all the way to, “Mom, I’m not stupid!” with a few interjections of, “Now, please!” and, “I know!!” in between.

Breathing deeply I recite Psalm 127:3 about children being a gift from the Lord and remind myself that eleven doesn’t last forever, choosing to forget that twelve will quickly be followed by teenage years.   In that moment, all I can hear is my mom’s voice saying, “I hope you have a child just like you someday!!”   And my throaty whisper, “Mom, I am so sorry.”

Been there?   If you have a child, I imagine you have been there, are there now, or know “there” is coming back around soon.

So, what’s a momma to do?   Taking refuge in Scripture, I often turn to Proverbs.   Knowing that these verses are filled with the wisdom that comes from experience brings me great comfort … usually that I’m not alone in whatever struggle I’m facing!

That old “go to” verse is familiar:

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.  Proverbs 22:6

But, I know parents who have faithfully raised their children in the “nurture and admonition of  the Lord” and seen them reject the truth of God’s Word.    You probably do too.   See, proverbs are simply wise sayings or precepts (dictionary.com) not absolute promises or guarantees.

And so, again I ask, what’s a momma to do?

I’m learning that parenting my daughter has so much more to do with my being God’s child than it does with her being mine.   Parenting is hard work!  But so is being a child.    How many times have you struggled  with being obedient to the Heavenly Father?  Submission is tough!

In the book of Proverbs I have found four principles of effective parenting – and in them, reminders of how I can continue to grow in my own relationship with my Father.

  1. Determine to parent character, not behavior.   Even a child makes himself known by his acts,by whether his conduct is pure and upright. ~ Proverbs 20:11   Do you focus more on good behavior or a pure heart in your children?  Our focus in childrearing must be on our children’s hearts!  Yes, we must teach appropriate behavior but at the core, effective parenting seeks to build a child’s character based on the truth of God’s Word.
  2. Desire wisdom for our children.  My son, if your heart is wise,my heart too will be glad. ~ Proverbs 23:15   Are you praying that your child will exhibit wisdom?   We need to be intentional about encouraging wise choices and wise thinking in the lives of our children.
  3. Develop an eternal focus at home.  By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches. ~ Proverbs 24:3-4    What is the focus in your home?  Is it temporal or eternal?   Build your home with an eternal passion … engaging your children in sharing the Gospel, reaching the poor and oppressed, and ministering to the widows and orphans.
  4. Discipline with purpose.  The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother… Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart. ~ Proverbs 29:15, 17  We must not be afraid to discipline our children; likewise, we must be willing to question our motives and purposes in discipline.  Scripture tells us that a loving father will discipline his son but, as one who has experienced the discipline of the Father, that discipline is never rooted in anger, fear, or comparison.
These tween years are tough … but so were the toddler years and I am pretty sure the teen years will bring challenges I cannot today imagine.   Parenting is not for wimps – whether your child is 2 or 52.   We’ve got to be soaking ourselves in the Word of God in order to begin to do it well.

 

What is your greatest parenting challenge and how do you find wisdom to manage it?

Fighting Irenes

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Last weekend the US East Coast experienced destruction by a certain female: Hurricane Irene. We tracked her moves, listened to response plans, and rallied our resources to counter her attack. Usually, sea breezes soothe and refresh, and coastal skies fill with pastel palettes of color, but the beautiful and gentle can turn evil.  Once past, peace was restored for most, though some lives were forever changed by Irene.

 

Sexual intimacy is God’s wedding gift, inviting a man and woman to be freely “intoxicated” in love (5:19). Desires are satisfied “at all times with delight” (5:19) when we drink from our “own cistern” (5:15) and enjoy the spouse of our youth (5:18). Physical intimacy in the marriage covenant starkly contrasts stolen delights outside of marriage. If sex within marriage is the warm sands and gentle breezes of a coastal paradise, adultery is the devastation by a tropical tempest coming ashore.

 

More subtle, less public, yet equally destructive, an adulteress ravages lives.  The tempter (male or female) is not only deceiving, but is deceived (5:6). The appearance of an adulteress may be beautiful; her words are persuasive and compelling (7:21). God’s plan for contentment in sexual intimacy (5:15-19) comes up against the Enemy’s plan to take casualties as men and women fall into infatuation with a cheap substitute.

She (the adulteress/adultery):

  • flatters her targets, married or unmarried
  • forsakes her own rightful companion
  • forgets the marriage/spiritual covenants made

Though she may not seem toxic at first contact, “can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?” (6:28). Death is her own end, and death is what she offers:  death of a dream, a relationship, a marriage, a home, a family, a testimony.  I’ve listened to many women share their private and painful stories of how an adulterous affair (their own or their husband’s) has broken their hearts and ravaged their homes. I’ve wept with them as they count the high price paid for momentary pleasure.   Our Enemy counts his casualties with a smile.

 

When a man or woman responds to the lust’s lure, “as a bird rushes into a snare; he does not know that it will cost him his life” (Proverbs 7:23). The Enemy doesn’t plan for our contentment; the Enemy, who has always come as an angel of light and beauty, plans to take casualties.

 

Young couples may think they’re too in love to fall prey. Old couples may think they’re too experienced to fall prey. The truth is that adultery has ravaged many marriages, “many a victim she has laid low, and all her slain are a mighty throng” (Proverbs 7:26). Many have fallen. Many mighty have fallen.

 

If we warmly embrace or coldly repel the one to whom we’re pledged, God sees. If we welcome (with a glance or an email or a smile) one to whom we are not pledged, God sees.  He gives us the gift of sexual intimacy within marriage; “a man’s ways are before the eyes of the Lord, and he ponders all his paths” (5:21). God sees how we use His gift of sexuality, whether we honor Him in our marriages or embrace the Enemy’s substitute.

Never has it been so easy to welcome images into our homes, into the palms of our hands, and ultimately into our hearts, all the while under the adulterous deception that it’s private and harmless.

To avoid the snare:

  • Attend to and invest in your own marriage. (5:15-19)
  • Avoid and ignore temptation. (5:8)

The Maker of gentle breezes and pastel sunsets designed joy for us in the miracle of sexual intimacy between a husband and wife. The Enemy adorns his lures in beautiful, non-threatening garments, with voices mimicking the gentle surf.  Don’t be fooled.  “Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless … For a man’s ways are before the eyes of the Lord …” (Proverbs 5:8, 21).

 

Passages to explore in Proverbs regarding Adultery:  2:16-19; 5:1-14; 6:20-35; 7:1-17

The Wife Your Marriage Needs

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If you’ve been married more than six months you know that marriage isn’t always easy.

In Ephesians 5:23-33 we’re told the Christian marriage is to be a reflection of Christ and the church – a beautiful example to the world of what true sacrificial love and oneness looks like. Unfortunately, the divorce rate in the church is equal to that of the world.

Some have the benefit of their parent’s godly example of a good, strong marriage, but most don’t. There is no How to Do This Marriage Right manual handed out when we say “I Do”. Even as I write this, I realize many of you may be in messy marriages. Perhaps you feel like you’re shriveling up in a dry and barren relationship or maybe you just know things could be better on the home front.

My prayer is that you’ll have a fresh understanding that our marriages are much more about our relationship with God than they are about our relationships with our husbands.

My prayer for those of you who are hurting and on the edge is that God will make a miracle out of your marriage.

I learned along time ago that I can’t fix my man – but I’m not accountable to God for him.  I am, however, accountable for how I act and react in my marriage.

We may not be handed a marriage manual when we say, “I do” but we have the greatest guidebook available…the Word of God. So as we peruse through Proverbs, let’s commit to be doers of the Word and not hearers only regardless of what our husbands do or don’t do.

I promise you, sweet friend, it may not change your man (he has to work on his own issues) but it will certainly change you in the midst of your marriage and help you become the woman your marriage needs.

It’s interesting to note that Proverbs doesn’t give our men many words of wisdom about marriage. Perhaps that’s because with 1,000 women in the house, Solomon was wise enough to know that if momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.

But we do find two very important directives for every husband to live by:

• Love your wife well and be faithful to her (Proverbs 5:18, 6:28-29).

After all, that’s what the heart of every woman longs for – a man who will really love her ’til the end. When he really loves her, he’ll put her needs before his own; he’ll protect her and provide for her; he’ll try to understand the longings of her heart; he’ll even make those late-night trips to the store for Midol, ice cream and a movie – because when he loves her well… he loves her with his life. That’s what sacrificial love looks like.

Words of Wisdom for the Wife:

The best list of traits that should identify a Christian wife are found in the oh-so-intimidating verses of Proverbs 31:10-31. 

• She’s a woman of strong character whom her husband can trust to do what is good and right for him and their family. Her man can trust her with his heart, his home and his finances (Proverbs 31:10-12).

• She’s a wise, diligent, hard-working woman who takes care of herself, her hubby and her household. She’s much too busy to be found sitting on the couch eating bonbons and watching soap operas all day (Proverbs 31:13-19,21-22,24).

• She has a servant’s heart and ministers to the poor (Proverbs 31:20).

• She is a woman of dignity who is wise with her words and, much like a boy scout, is always prepared for the unexpected (Proverbs 31:25-27).

• Like a pillar, she upholds her husband and helps him become all he can be. In the process she garners the praise of her man and their children. Her own works sing her praises, as well (Proverbs 31:23,28).

• She understands that true beauty is found in a heart that fears the Lord. Her life comes from the overflow of her relationship with God (Proverbs 31:10).

More Words for the Wife from Proverbs:

• A good wife is a priceless treasure to her husband (Proverbs 12:4, 18:22, 31:10).

• A prudent and understanding wife is from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22, 19:14).

• An irritable, quarrelsome, critical and complaining wife can make a man wish he never said, “I do” (Proverbs 21:9, 25:24, 27:15).

Being the wife your man needs will make you the wife your marriage needs – and vice versa. It isn’t always easy. It’s a day by day diligent and intentional effort of the heart. But we work on being the wife our marriage needs because our marriage is to be an overflow of our relationship with God and a picture of Christ and the church.

As you read through the words of wisdom from Proverbs, did you see any areas you need to work on as a wife? Do you have any godly counsel you can share with other wives that would help them become the women their marriage needs?

 

 

 

You’ve Got a Friend

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I have to admit I am very excited about today’s post because the Lord has blessed me beyond measure with several good, godly friends. They are living descriptions and definitions of what it means to be a friend. Unfortunately, their lives often remind me of how far I fall short of being not only the kind of friend they deserve, but also the kind of friend the Bible calls me to be.

Friends are powerful influences in our lives. They have the capacity to encourage us to live as we know we ought and to challenge us to accomplish more than we could envision. Yet, they are also capable of dragging us lower than we thought we’d ever go and into doing things we thought we’d never do. That’s why it is so important we choose our friends wisely.

Throughout Proverbs, Solomon gives us words of wisdom about the significance of our friendships. As we walk through the Word together today and begin our Proverbial friendship dig, we’ll unearth some priceless treasures of wisdom, warnings and encouragement.

1. Proverbs 7:3-5– Insight (understanding) is your friend. Insight is a necessary ingredient to help us live well and choose wisely. No wonder Solomon calls insight our friend.

2. Proverbs 14:20, Proverbs 19:4, Proverbs 19:7, Proverbs 19:6 – When it comes to friendships, motives matter. Financial status should never make or break any friendship.

3. Proverbs 16:28 , Proverbs 17:9 – A warning about words is necessary if we want to be and have good friends. Honesty, discretion and confidence are necessary on both sides of the friendship equation. Choosing trustworthy friends is as important as being a trustworthy friend.

4. Proverbs 17:17– Unconditional love is the foundation of true, long-lasting, life-enhancing friendships. We never look more like Christ than when we love at all times.

5. Proverbs 18:24 – The power of unsavory friendships to destroy each other is troublesome for those who don’t wisely select their friends. Yet, those who are wise will not only choose loyal friends, but will also be loyal friends.

6. Proverbs 22:11 – A friend who has a pure heart and a gracious tongue will speak with wisdom and earn the listening ear of leaders.

7. Proverbs 12:26, Proverbs 22:24-25– Just as a good friend has the power to encourage you to do what is right and good, an ungodly friend can lead you astray. Solomon’s words of wisdom speak through the portals of time warning us to cautiously choose who we befriend.

8. Proverbs 27:6 , Proverbs 27:9 – Giving and receiving good and godly counsel and correction is an important aspect of healthy friendships. When you know a friend loves you, her counsel is trustworthy and sweet – even if it’s hard to hear. In contrast, sweet words are wicked when the heart of the one speaking is also wicked.

9. Proverbs 27:10 – Friendships are a matter of the heart. True friends love each other, want the best for each other, are there for each other no matter what. They laugh and cry together; they hold each other up and they show up when everyone else runs away.

10. Proverbs 27:17 – Friends sharpen each other. They give each other permission to correct one another – to challenge one another – to speak truth to each other even when it hurts – to say not only what the other wants to hear, but what she needs to hear.

Do you have a filter for the friends you chose? Do your friends help you be a better person or a bitter person? Do you give your friends permission to say what you need to hear? Do you have any friends right now that bring out the worst in you or cause you to make foolish choices? 

I’d love to know how your own special friends have made a difference in your life – so please add your own girlfriend story in the comments.

Oh, and for fun, I just couldn’t resist adding the lyrics to this little ditty from Toy Story (bet you’ll be singing it before you get to the 3rd line!)… :-)

You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
When the road looks rough ahead
And you’re miles and miles
From your nice warm bed
Just remember what your old pal said
Boy, you’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me 
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got troubles, well I’ve got ’em too
There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you
We stick together and we see it through
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me 

Some other folks might be
A little bit smarter than I am
Bigger and stronger too
Maybe
But none of them will ever love you the way I do 
It’s me and you
And as the years go by
Boys, our friendship will never die
You’re gonna see
It’s our destiny
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me

 

 

 

A Parent’s Plea

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Kathy and her son Mark

{Such a great post .. we’re linking it to Top Ten Tuesday at Oh Amanda’s!  Better two weeks late than never!! ~ Teri Lynne}

In just over a week, my husband and I will be taking our son, our youngest, to college. So many questions and concerns pop in and out of my head as the day draws near. Things like:

  • Will he take his studies seriously?
  • Will he make friends and feel connected?
  • Will he make church a priority?
  • Will he stand firm in the truth he has been taught?
  • Will he always have clean underwear?

For eighteen years we have taught him God’s truth and tried to live it out before him. We shared our “learned by experience” wisdom with our son, praying that he would not have to learn all these lessons the hard way. The closer the day of his departure draws the more urgent the message becomes. Now he has to make it his own. He has to live it out for himself.

In the book of Proverbs, the father also admonishes his son to live in God’s wisdom. In the first seven chapters we see ten specific “appeals to wisdom.” The father’s directives include reasons the son should comply. The father says “don’t” or “do” then follows it with a benefit or consequence. (He knew his son would want to know “why” he should heed his father’s advice.)

These ten passages are packed with much more wisdom and godly advice than we have room to cover here. I have merely summarized the father’s advice. I encourage you to take the time to read the passages and mull over the wisdom found there. Here’s my summary:

1.      Proverbs 1:8-19
Appeal: Don’t be swayed to go after “ill-gotten” gain.
Why: Greed fosters all kinds of immoral and illegal behavior that will be your undoing.

2.      Proverbs 2:1-22
Appeal: Diligently seek after and follow wisdom and understanding.
Why: Then you will know what it means to fear God and your knowledge of Him will multiply.

3.      Proverbs 3:1-12
Appeal: Fear God by acknowledging, trusting, obeying, and honoring Him.
Why: God will guide and strengthen you.

4.      Proverbs 3:21-35
Appeal: Diligently preserve sound judgment and discernment.
Why: You will be secure in the Lord’s guidance and protection.

5.      Proverbs 4:1-9
Appeal: Honor wisdom and do not forsake it.
Why: You will enjoy full life, security, and honor.

6.      Proverbs 4:10-19
Appeal: Stay on the path of righteousness and avoid the way of evil.
Why: You will avoid obstacles and will not stumble.

7.      Proverbs 4:20-27
Appeal: Guard your heart and watch your mouth.
Why: You will live a full life and enjoy good health.

8.      Proverbs 5:1-23
Appeal: Maintain sexual purity.
Why: Lust is a snare that leads to heartache and ruin.

9.      Proverbs 6:20-35
Appeal: Run from lust and adultery.
Why: Adultery destroys and brings disgrace.

10.  Proverbs 7:1-27
Appeal: Don’t succumb to seduction.
Why: It leads to death.

Hmm. All sound advice. For our children. For us. May we teach it to our sons and daughters. May we heed it ourselves.

Proverbs: Letters for Everyday Life

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When our daughter started high school, I was overwhelmed with all I wanted her to remember. Friends coached me on what I “shouldn’t” do as a mom of a teenager…  Much to my teenager’s relief, I resisted the urge to hang my head out of the window and shout as I drove away from the curb, “forsake not your mother’s teaching… if sinners entice you, do not consent!” (1:8,10) :)  Instead, I began to write a letter to her each week, highlighting and reinforcing God’s truth in practical ways, so she would remember how to live it out in her personal behavior. The letters became treasures for her, and her wise choices became treasures for me. God’s truth is meant to transform our day to day lives.

God has written us letters of wisdom as treasures to take with us into our ordinary days. As we kick off a Scripture Dig study in the book of Proverbs, we find its theme in the first seven verse of the book (1:1-7); the goal is to explain and plant wisdom into God’s people, so they would show the world what restored life looks like.  The book begins with letter like mine, from a father to a son. These words of wisdom literature were written first to a Hebrew audience, but extended to all mankind. The “simple,” the young, the wise and the “one who understands” are specifically addressed to give “skill in the art of godly living.”

My husband Jeff with our high school freshman son Jake. Sharing wisdom for everyday life = PROVERBS

Like letters I’ve written for my own daughter, Proverbs is a collection of writings, an anthology. They make comparisons and illustrate consequences of choosing wise or foolish pathways.  As a parent longs for a child to cling to wisdom, so the writers of Proverbs call readers to choose the virtuous life among the ordinary, with the hope that extreme examples will clearly show how obedience brings blessing. The characters of the “wise,” “fool” and “simple” are used to impress the point of the joy of the wise and the folly of the fool.

While Solomon was the primary author or collector of these scriptures, he was not the only writer. Authors called “the wise,” “Hezekiah’s men,” Agur, and Lemuel penned some of the collection’s words. The words of the well known Proverbs 31are ascribed to King Lemuel, taught to him by his mother. The Book of Proverbs is part of Jewish Wisdom Literature, along with books like Job, Song of Solomon, and the wisdom Psalms. The ESV Study Bible identifies three characteristics in the Proverbs:

  • A virtue is commended.
  • A vice is held up for disapproval.
  • A value is affirmed

Proverbs puts truth to the test in our regular, everyday lives.

Oh, I’m excited about the days ahead as we open up God’s letters of wisdom and enjoy the treasures He has for us there! While preparing and studying, I could almost hear the Lord with His head out of the “heavenly window” shouting about wisdom of Proverbs …

“if you seek it like silver and search for it as hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God” (2:4,5).

I’m so glad He didn’t hold back! Will you join us as we dig into these treasured letters from our Heavenly Father?

Little things say a lot ~ Psalm 1

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In the South Carolina low country, there are marshes and rivers and ponds, lined with haunting moss-draped live oaks from which Dogwood trees peak out like little girls in brightly colored party dresses. At first glance, it’s just a beautiful garden. Strolling along the pathways, however, the lives of people with titles like “Enslaved Africans, Overseer, Owner” unfold as you walk through the restored rice plantation. As you follow the garden walkways the story of the founding couple is woven through acres like the vines that cling to trees framing the canals; two people who loved the land, art, writing, and history had a vision to preserve something of great value. The garden is a collection of  what caused their hearts to sing and all they treasured.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————

The Psalms are deeply personal, yet mean to be sung corporately. They often give voice to what can not find expression within our own limits. Understand the meaning of the basic facts gives us a glimpse to why these treasures have been preserved for us to enter into.

What does it mean to be “blessed?” ~ showered with favor from the Lord; in it’s Latin form, the word “beatus” is the same that gives us the word for “beattitude” in the Sermon on the Mount of Matt. 5:3-11.  The Greek equivalent of the original Hebrew word means “blessed,” and it’s the same word used in James 1:12, where the we find, “Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.”

Sometimes the smallest things in the garden give me the most awe, and words are no different.  The word for “man” refers to a “specific person,” meaning this is the example of a specific person to be followed. In Hebrew it’s literally “the man.”  This is the example we are called to follow, that of “the blessed man.”

This man – this blessed one – resists moving with, stopping with, and staying with those who reject the instruction of God. He embraces God’s truth and focuses on it consistently.  To “meditate” on the law has the idea of “active pondering.”  This is not sitting uselessly, staring into space, emptying our minds. Instead, it is repeatedly remembering, thinking with focus, calling to mind again, staying with one thought, considering carefully …. While our world rushes on to the next idea, gets a “short link,” abbreviates, and flags for reading another time, meditating is making a decision to spend extended time resting in one place of truth until it soaks in and takes root.

Little things say so much. When verse 6 tells us the Lord “knows the way of the righteous,” it means He  looks with affection, approval, and preference on the righteous man.  It’s quite a contrast with the wicked man who will perish.  People are and will be known by God.  People do and will perish. God doesn’t want to keep us from discovering the truth of what makes the difference.  He invites us to step inside the gateway and understand.

Tomorrow … the tree and the chaff … and me.  Will you come with me? 

It’s just a little further inside the garden gate.

The gateway ~ Psalm 1

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As Tara and I entered the garden, we saw abundant plant life, a magnificent sculpture, and a pathway leading beyond. It was my first time to Brookgreen Gardens, and my dear friend was eager to share it with me. Approaching the entrance, the beauty drew me in, stirring my interest to see more, but the gateway itself was only a glimpse of all that awaited.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Psalm 1 is what the ESV Study Bible calls “the gateway” to the Book of Psalms. This week we’ll spend four days lingering at the gateway to this Book, the song book of the people of God. If you want to know some background for the Psalter, I invite you to read here or to go here to note some of the landmarks that will help you journey further into the Book. If we take time to see the elements included in the first of the 150 Psalms, we prepare ourselves to appreciate and enjoy the beauty of what lies beyond the gateway.

To know this passage of 6 verses, it helps to observe the facts. Tomorrow we’ll consider more of the meaning of what we find in this first poem that was and is still meant to be sung.

This Psalm describes 2 kinds of men:  blessed men and wicked men.

Blessed men prosper.  Wicked men perish.

Blessed men do 5 actions in the first 3 verses:

  • walk not … in the counsel of the wicked
  • stand not … in the way of sinners
  • delight … in the law of the Lord (meaning the Torah, first 5 books, at the original time of writing)
  • meditate … on God’s law
  • prosper … in all he does

Wicked men do 2 actions in verse 5:

  • stand not … in the judgement
  • stand not … in the congregation of the righteous

There are 3 “but” statements:

  • Blessed men don’t linger in wickedness BUT delight in God’s word.
  • Wicked men are not like a prospering tree BUT are like chaff.
  • God approves of the righteous BUT the wicked will perish.

2 Similes are used in this poem:

  • Blessed man … like a tree that is by a stream, yields fruit, & doesn’t wither
  • Wicked man … like chaff blown away uselessly by the wind

Tomorrow we’ll reflect on what some of this means, but for today, let’s recognize that “the Lord knows the way of the righteous.”  Since there are 2 kinds of men, it’s important to know that God is fully aware of our hearts.

As I entered through the gate of the southern garden, I saw sculpture, plants, and architecture. I acknowledged the pieces, but uncovering their meaning amplified the beauty of the discovery.

Join me tomorrow as we pear further into the meaning of the facts in these 6 verses shaping the arch through which we enter the Book of Psalms. I encourage you to take time to read Psalm 1 aloud; find it here.  Better than that, would you memorize it with me over the next 4 days? It’s not a hard Psalm to commit to memory, and we already know the “pieces.”  The rest of the week, let’s look at questions like:

  • What makes the blessed man proper?
  • Why doesn’t the tree wither?
  • Why is chaff useless, and what is it, anyways?
  • What does it mean the “the Lord knows”?
  • What does it really mean to be “blessed”?
  • How in the world can you “meditate day and night”?!?!?!?
  • What does the counsel of the wicked and the seat of scoffers look like in the modern world?
  • What do you want to know about this Psalm?

I’ll see you tomorrow ….. just inside the gateway….

Empty into full

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She arrived empty handed, shuffling into Bethlehem, far from her homeland, away from her relatives, without possessions, bringing only memories of the pain that sent her there and the hope that got her there. Naomi made it clear the likelihood of rescue was nil. All knew she was a foreigner from the land of idol worshipers. Who could redeem the widowed, barren, pagan Ruth? And if one could, would he?


Boaz was able to change Ruth’s empty to full. The humble kinsman became obedient  and willingly acted on his love for the unprotected outcast stooping in his field. Knowing her journey was a choice to embrace His God, Boaz knew she was taking shelter under the refuge of Jehovah’s wings. Boaz was able and willing to give her refuge under the shelter of his “wings,” (2:12,3:9) purchasing her as his own through marriage and redemption. Drawing Ruth into his world, he protected her purity, restored more than she lost, and insured her future reward. Boaz willingly changed her empty to full.


As a kinsman, Boaz was able to provide rescue to the helpless woman, but he was also willing to do his duty of redemption as “Kinsman-Redeemer.” He took an empty foreigner with no hope, calling her “accepted,” and lifting her to be his bride with secure blessings and a glorious future.

In the same way, Christ was able and willing to act on behalf of the lost in need of redemption. “But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those where under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons” (Gal. 4:4-5).  Our rescue required His humanity, and he “humbled himself by becoming obedient to death — even death on a cross!” (Phil. 2:8) The Son of God, our Kinsman, acted to rescue us from our desperate condition, making us pure, restoring more than what was lost, insuring future reward.


In his book Twelve Extraordinary Women, John MacArthur says, “Ruth is a fitting symbol of every believer, and even of the church itself – redeemed, brought into a position of great favor, endowed with riches and privilege, exalted to be the Redeemer’s own bride, and loved by Him with the profoundest affection” (p. 85).

Our pain sends us searching for Jesus, and hope gets us to Him. When the helpless stoop before Him, we cannot fathom the love extending His wings of refuge, joyfully taking us from wretch to bride. In heaven a song is sung to the Lamb of God, Jesus, because “with <his> blood <he> purchased for God  persons from every tribe and language and people and nation” (Rev. 5:9b). Our Redeemer changes our empty to full.


We thought we faced a future of scraping for refuse in the fields, but our loving Lord has given us the inheritance reserved for His beloved. Just like Boaz purchased the unclaimed and destitute woman of Moab as his bride, so Christ purchased us to make us His own and restore to us a glorious future.


Without the love of our able and willing Redeemer, we would still be suffering in the field. Gwen Smith shares the story of Christ’s rescue in her song Broken into Beautiful. Reflect on what Boaz did for Ruth and rejoice in what Christ does for the broken as you listen to Gwen’s testimony in song. When Jesus takes us from empty to full, we must never cease to be gratefully amazed.

My Mother-in-Law Rocks!

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Mine really does rock … she has treated me as her own daughter from the first time we met.  And though we don’t always agree, I am thankful every day for her.   She is a wonderful mother, a fabulous Nana, and a compassionate daughter.   But, even with all that, if my husband had passed away and she told me to go back to my family, I would do just that.

When I read the first few verses of Ruth, I find myself understanding Orpah’s decision and relating to her.  Going back to what was familiar, where was familiar, who was familiar.   Returning to her mother’s home rather than building a new home with her mother-in-law.  I imagine many would make that same choice.

Ruth’s story is so compelling, her love for Naomi so amazing, because she left her home, her family, the only life she’d ever known to accompany her mother-in-law to a place where she would be unwelcome if not totally ostracized.  Yesterday, Julie beautifully described the qualities in Naomi that likely caused Ruth to make this most bizarre choice.

Today, I want to consider a few ways Ruth expressed her loyalty to Naomi and some practical applications we can find for our lives.

  1. Ruth stayed, even when the reason for staying was gone. Though her husband had died, Ruth chose to stay with Naomi.   How often are we guilty of leaving a relationship too quickly, without allowing God to work on us and through us?   We serve a relational God and we need to be committed to building and sustaining relationships … even when the people we are around have become bitter and difficult.
  2. Ruth journeyed with Naomi. The journey of life is full of twists and turns, ups and downs, and yet the people who come alongside us are important to the fullness of the experience.   We need to invite people to join our journey, accept the invitation of others to join them, and share the paths of life together.
  3. Ruth provided for Naomi. Ruth met social, emotional, and physical needs for Naomi.   As we journey, we need to be need-meeters.  Far too often, the Body of Christ fails in this area.   Helping others, providing for others, is a duty for the believer and it is also a blessing.   We must be diligent in this pursuit … seeking opportunities and embracing them as they come.
  4. Ruth respected Naomi. Certainly they had diverse backgrounds and there was most certainly a generation gap, and yet Ruth treated Naomi with the utmost respect.   We must be respectful – kind, courteous, and gracious – to others if we are live in the fullness of life in Christ.

Certainly we can learn much from Ruth’s example of loyalty to Naomi.  Traveling life’s road with others can be difficult … but it is also a beautiful gift we are given.   How have you been blessed through your relationships with others?

Home where I belong ~ Naomi

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In auditions for the parts of Ruth and Naomi, Naomi’s line would be shorter. Kristi revealed what it meant to live “in the days when the judges ruled,” helping us understand why well loved Naomi, whose name meant “pleasant,” became embittered and empty. She is the only one in the story who experienced both journeys, to Moab and back to Bethlehem.

She had no idea of the high price they would pay for “flagrant disregard to the standards of the God who redeemed them.” It couldn’t have been easy for Naomi’s family to decide to flee the famine by going to pagan Moab. They were from the Ephrathite clan in the city of Bethlehem, in the territory of Judah. Overwhelmed by physical needs, they abandoned spiritual faith and decided to get around God’s plan for blessing. First they “sojourned,” then “remained,” and finally “lived there.” Rejecting the land where God settled them and embracing life in Moab, Naomi watched as her husband and two sons died in the span of ten years. Faced with the pain, her mother’s heart suffered deeply. Stepping outside of God’s will left her alone, with two foreign daughters-in-law and no security.  Like many women, Naomi became disillusioned and confused by her circumstances.  But then she heard news from home; God had met the needs of His people (1:6). It was time to return.


It’s not easy for a well know lady like Naomi to humbly return to the place she never should’ve left. Once “pleasant,” she wanted to be called “bitter.”  Upon her return as “Mara,” she declared, “the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty” (1:21). When she came home, “the whole town was stirred.”

When we see the defeated, worn out, bitter and embarrassed Naomi, we might be relieved she’s not our roommate, but Ruth’s responses to her mother-in-law prove otherwise.

Naomi was struggling in the fallout of rebellious choices, but even when she made up her mind to return to Bethlehem, she declared her hope for the Lord to deal kindly with Ruth and Orpah.  She hadn’t stopped believing He was God; she just lost confidence in His love for her.


Naomi was a strong influencer, but her wanderings from God distorted her perspective, and she urged her daughters-in-law to return to their pagan gods. Ruth knew better. Through the Moab years, Ruth saw Naomi’s faith and trust in Yahweh shine through the darkness of despair. Even in a foreign land, the older woman’s life pointed to the true God in the midst of their shared circumstances and pain.


Once Naomi was back where she belonged, her perspective changed. She became a wise voice of counsel to her daughter-in-law Ruth. As she watched God provide blessing for obedience, she couldn’t help declare about Boaz, “May he be blessed by the Lord, whose kindness has not forsaken the living or the dead!” (2:20) Naomi remembered the kindness of her God.

We may become discouraged by circumstances and losses of life, but when we remember the kindness of the one true God, bitterness dissolves.

Are you living life as Mara or Naomi? Are you in the place where God can bless you? If you’re empty, maybe it’s time to journey back.

God’s unchanging plans… and unexpected ways (cont.)

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Yesterday we began to explore the question of why the manger? We began back in Genesis 3, so take a quick look at that post if you missed it!

The Passover was just the beginning of the lessons God had in store for the descendants of Abraham. As God brought them out of Egypt, He formed them into a nation with a “constitution” unique to them – laws and regulations for how to live as a unique theocracy where their holy God was their King and actually lived among them. The law constantly pointed out to the people that they were in the presence of a holy God – and they were inherently unclean because of sin and the broken state of this world.

They could not approach their holy God; even though He lived among them in a carefully planned Tabernacle, no one could approach Him, no one could pull back the rich tapestries of curtains and march into His awesome presence without it costing their very lives. No matter how hard they tried, they could not make themselves holy enough to regain the communion that was lost back in the Garden. They could not keep themselves clean. They could not sacrifice away their sin and the evil that lurked in their hearts.

As Israel became established in the land God had promised them and eventually demanded to have a human king to rule over them, it quickly became clear that no mere human king could save them. Every human leader failed, in small ways and often very dramatic ways – every human leader was flawed and sinful. No king could lead them to victory over their own sin; no king could provide them freedom from oppression and the brokenness of the human condition, let alone crush the serpent and reclaim what had been lost in the Garden.

They needed a better sacrifice – a Sacrifice much greater, much more costly, than any animal from their flock. They needed a better Priest who did not have to atone for his own sins before offering atonement for theirs. They needed a better King who could reign righteously without end and conquer the invisible enemies as well as the visible.

There was only one solution: God the Son Himself would come. He would dwell among us, not removed and separated from us, but as one of us. He would humble Himself, wrap Himself in flesh, walk with us, suffer among us, touch us, heal us, and ultimately die in our place as the one perfect Passover Lamb. Starting with the manger, God would fulfill centuries of promises – promises to Adam, Abraham, David; promises given through prophets, events hinted at throughout Israel’s history.

By becoming small, He would reclaim everything that was lost. By coming quietly to the outcasts He would change the course of history. He would come first as a suffering servant, and someday He would return as the conquering King of kings.

God’s great plan began to unfold in Bethlehem that night in the unlikeliest of ways, the most unexpected of places… and all heaven rejoiced at the sight of it.

Related reading:

God’s Big Story – a summary of God’s plan from Genesis to Revelation

The Word Became Flesh

Yahweh Has Come to Dwell Among Us (parts one, two, and three)

We hope you will continue to join us as we prepare our hearts and reflect on this Christmas season! If you haven’t done so before, please consider becoming a subscriber so you don’t miss any future posts!

God’s unchanging plans… and unexpected ways

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Christmas always hits me a little differently when I am pregnant. As I write this post I myself am nine months pregnant, feeling mysterious kicks and turns, anxious for my sweet baby’s arrival, dealing with the nagging anxiety that every expectant mother faces about what lies ahead. I frequently find myself wondering what that first Christmas was like for Mary – a young virgin in her teens, carrying the promised Redeemer, the Word in flesh, the God-man. What did she reflect on as she journeyed uncomfortably for days on the back of a donkey, heavy with the weight of the child in her womb, heavy with the weight of the responsibility entrusted to her? Did she share her ponderings with Joseph? Did she even know him that well? Was she afraid as she began to feel those first twinges of birth pangs? Did she weep in an unfamiliar town, on the floor of a dirty stable, without her mother or a female friend to comfort and counsel her through the overwhelming process of giving birth to her firstborn – the Son of God?

God’s plan to redeem the world from sin and death did not unfold as anyone might have expected. So today we ask along with Mary, “why?” Why the manger?

Throughout the Old Testament, God gives us glimpses of His unfolding plan. Back in the Garden of Eden, as the first man and his wife stood shameful and naked in their sin and receiving the worst news mankind would ever hear, God did not leave them hopeless – He promised a Redeemer: a seed of the woman who would crush the serpent and make everything right once again (Genesis 3:15). Adam and Eve just could not have understood the amazing intricacy of God’s plan and the depth of His love – God rarely does anything in the ways we expect.

Years later, one man named Abraham received an impossible three-fold promise from this Creator-God: Abraham, an elderly man without children to carry his name, would have unimaginable numbers of descendants who would form a great nation, God would give them a land to call their own, and through this people, all the nations of the world would be blessed (Genesis 12:1-3). Through this man and his family, God would bring the promised Redeemer, the Seed of Eve that had been promised many years before. God rarely does anything in the ways we expect.

God did give Abraham the child he had longed for. Isaac, named after the joy and disbelief-filled laughter of his parents, and those after him indeed became numerous. And once again, God did not form this great nation of promise in an expected way. He allowed them to be enslaved in a foreign country, despised and segregated from the surrounding culture, insulated to a great extent from outside influences as the generations flourished and became great in number. And in a way that only God could plan, He purchased them out of captivity and taught them vividly through the night of Passover that the only way of safety was to be marked with blood of a spotless lamb, to be set apart to Him alone.

To be continued…

Confidence: Finding Rest in the Sovereignty of God

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I frequently talk with other believers who seem to be struggling with a deep fear of the future. Their confidence in the government has been rocked, the security of their 401K has been shaken, they watch the news fretfully for updates about the latest Supreme Court decision or word from Iran.

Are these things serious? Of course- but they need not shake our confidence. If we truly believe that our God is sovereign, that absolutely nothing has escaped His notice or is out of His control, then there is a deep sense of calm in our hearts even as we write letters to our senators, seek financial counsel, cast our ballots, and urge those around us to know and obey the Truth.

In 1 Samuel chapter 2, we find Hannah praying a prayer we would do well to emulate.

Recount and Rejoice!

Then Hannah prayed and said: “My heart rejoices in the LORD; in the LORD my horn is lifted high. My mouth boasts over my enemies, for I delight in your deliverance.There is no one holy like the LORD; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” (v.1-2)

There is no Rock like our God! Oh, the hope and promise of those words. One of the best ways to battle fear and worry is to praise Him – to recount truths about His character, His ways, His promises. Have you noticed how many times throughout the Bible God’s faithfulness to His people is recounted in prayer and public praise? If you find yourself fretting over the news or the “what ifs” in your head, you must make a choice to replace those thoughts with truth. Rehearse truths of God’s character and ways to yourself, fill your mind and mouth with Scripture and praise – choose to rejoice in who our God truly is.

Remind Yourself of His Omniscience

“Do not keep talking so proudly or let your mouth speak such arrogance, for the LORD is a God who knows, and by him deeds are weighed.” (v. 3)

As I shared last week in our discussion about praying for our churches, I find great comfort in two simple words: “He knows!” He knows your heart, He knows your thoughts, He knows what is around the corner of your life. While we might find ourselves shocked and taken aback by current events, nothing ever comes as a surprise to Him – for the LORD is a God who knows.

Not only does He know, but He is the only one able and worthy to weigh our deeds and the deeds of others. He knows the motivation behind each act, each word; He knows every thought. I find myself often praying, “O Lord, you know!” What a comfort it is that His ways are higher than mine, His understanding is deeper, His thoughts are purer- it gives me great confidence as I offer my trust and the words, “Thy will be done.”

Remember He is the One Who Raises Up and Puts Down

“The bows of the warriors are broken, but those who stumbled are armed with strength.

Those who were full hire themselves out for food, but those who were hungry hunger no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children, but she who has had many sons pines away.

The LORD brings death and makes alive; he brings down to the grave and raises up.

The LORD sends poverty and wealth; he humbles and he exalts.

He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes and has them inherit a throne of honor.
For the foundations of the earth are the LORD’s; upon them he has set the world.” (v. 4-8)

No one is alive who has not been created by the hand of our God. Both wealth and poverty are in His hands. No world ruler sits in his office by his own power and doing – we serve a God who raises up and who puts down.

Do I understand everything He does and allows? Absolutely not! But I trust that His plans are much grander than I can comprehend. I can pray for God’s direction for those in authority over me – be that my husband, my church leadership, my government, my employer – and I can pray with confidence, knowing that there is no one who is out of the sphere of God’s control.

Rest in His Ultimate Victory

“He will guard the feet of his saints, but the wicked will be silenced in darkness.

It is not by strength that one prevails; those who oppose the LORD will be shattered.
He will thunder against them from heaven; the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.
He will give strength to his king and exalt the horn of his anointed.” (v. 9-10)

When everything seems to be spinning out of control, we rest in this: we know the end of the story, and our God wins! One day there will be full and final justice. One day every knee will bow to Him. One day Satan and all those who rebel against God’s name will be completely defeated.

Feeling fearful today? Perhaps it is time to prayerfully recount and rejoice, remind yourself, remember, and rest. Our God is firmly on His throne – and He has invited you to approach that throne with confidence.

Supplemental Reading:

The God Who Raises Up and Puts Down – a look at how Hannah’s prayer ties the books of 1st and 2nd Samuel together

Fear God, Honor the King – a gentle challenge to my fellow believers who disagree with Obama’s administration: when belief in God’s sovereignty gets real

Worthy is the Lamb – an ongoing series on the book of Revelation to fix our eyes on the end of the story!

Double Whammy

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Have you loved digging into prayer as much as I have?

I must confess, this is an area in which I consider myself very weak.   When it comes to Bible study and digging into the Word – I get hyped up and ready to go.  But prayer just doesn’t come as naturally to me.

I shared my struggle with an older believer several years ago and she encouraged me to pray Scripture.    Also, through reading the Power of a Praying … books by Stormie Omartian, I learned of the great power of praying God’s Word back to Him.     What could be more useful in developing a prayer life than using the very Word of God as a foundation for our conversations? It’s sort of a “double whammy” in our prayers.

I was encouraging our senior adults at church to use Scripture in their prayers and one gentlemen said to me, “We aren’t all Bible scholars like you!”    Let me assure you – I’m no Bible scholar!  In fact, as I responded to this dear man, “I wasn’t born with this knowledge of Scripture.”   I’ve been investing in it for many years.     It’s not so much about how much Scripture you know, rather praying Scripture is realizing the truth of God’s Word and claiming it in your life.

Tomorrow, during Your Turn, we’ll be going through a passage and praying through it.  But for today, I’d like to share with you some of the ways using Scripture can build your prayer life.

Understanding God’s Character

As we study Scripture we grow in our understanding of God’s character and how that relates to our lives.   By recognizing that He is love (1 John 4:8), we can come to Him acknowledging that He loves us and desires the best for us … even when we don’t understand His ways (Isaiah 55:9).

Trusting God’s Promises

Throughout Scripture we find the promises of God and as we pray we have confidence that He will save us (John 3:16), that He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7), that He will forgive us (1 John 1:9), that His plan is for our good (Jeremiah 29:11) and so many more.  Knowing God’s promises gives us confidence in our relationship with Him and helps us trust in His care for our lives.

Recognizing God’s Faithfulness

Throughout the Bible we see that God is faithful to His people … both the Israelites in the Old Testament and the early church in the New.    We can pray to the same “God who sees me” as Hagar did (Genesis 16:13), the “God who heals me” as Miriam (Exodus 15:26),  the “Lord, my Rock” as David (Psalm 144:1), the Good Shepherd (John 10:11), the Alpha and Omega (Revelation 22:13).

Claiming God’s Provision

Throughout Scripture we find abundant reminders that God will provide for all our needs.   We find that He will give us rest (Psalm 23:2), protection (Isaiah 43:2), food and clothing (Matthew 6:25-32), wisdom (James 1:5) and so much more.

Learning to pray Scripture is an amazing way to grow your prayer life. I have specific prayers for my daughter and my husband – claiming Scripture for their lives.   And as I read my Bible each day, I use the passages I have read as a foundation for my prayers … asking God to change me to match His Word.  I have found great comfort and peace in learning to pray Scripture and I hope you will be encouraged to do the same!

How do you incorporate Scripture into your prayers?

Recommended Reading:

Praying the Names of God by Ann Spangler

Praying the Names of Jesus by Ann Spangler

Any of the Power of a Praying books by Stormie Omartian

Praying God’s Word by Beth Moore

Praying the Psalms by Elmer Towns {Mr. Towns has written several books about praying through specific passages of Scripture.}


How did we get 66? Part One

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What is the Canon?

Who decided that the 66 books we know as the Bible were the books that should be included and no others? Just who chose the canon?

The term “canon” is used to refer to the “closed collection of documents that constitute authoritative Scripture.” The ancient word “canon” means a “reed or measuring stick.” The biblical canon or Bible includes the writings that are recognized and accepted as the revealed Word of God and is the standard of measure for the Christian’s life and faith.

But how did the biblical canon come to be recognized as that? We learn from the Bible itself that it is the very words of God, given to us through the hands of human authors through the divine inspiration of the Holy Spirit. We’ve also come to know and trust this truth through our experience with it. The Word of God is living and active. It touches our hearts and lives in a way that no other book and no words of mere man ever could. Because of this, it’s important to realize that humans did not decide which books to accept. They merely sought to recognize the ones God set forth. (For info on the reliability of the Bible read “Is the Bible Reliable?)

Old Testament

The Jews considered three factors when recognizing which books God wanted included in the Old Testament canon.

  1. Written by a prophet of God – it had to be clear that the human author of the book was chosen by God to be His mouthpiece. Did his prophecy come true? Did his words come with power?
  2. Written for all generations – the book had to impact all people for all time. Its message had to be relevant far beyond its original audience.
  3. Written in agreement with previous revelation – God’s Word will not contradict itself. His truth remains the same so new revelation will be in accordance with what He has already revealed.

The Hebrew people used these guidelines to determine which books belonged in the canon and which did not. There is strong historical and biblical evidence that the Old Testament canon was firmly established by the time of Christ and maybe even by the mid-second century B.C.

Although the books were grouped and divided differently over the centuries causing the exact number of books to change, the books accepted as canonical by the Jews did not change. During a Jewish council in Jamnia around 90 AD this previously accepted canon was officially confirmed. And this is the same Old Testament canon that Protestants use today. (See the end of this article for a note on the Apocryphal.)

End of Part One. Tune in tomorrow for Part Two about the New Testament Canon.

Kathy Howard

Note: The Apocryphal (“hidden”) books recognized by Roman Catholics and Eastern Orthodox Christians were all written during the intertestamental period. Jews never accepted them as inspired at the same level as the earlier books. In fact, Jewish testimony in Rabbinic literature of the second through fifth centuries AD clearly show that the Jews believed that prophecy ceased after the time of Ezra and Nehemiah. Haggai, Zechariah, and Malachi were prophets during this time frame. That means no book dated later than 450 to 400 BC would be considered as part of the Hebrew Scriptures. Most Hebrew scholars consider the Apocryphal books to be good historical documents but not to be equated with divinely inspired writing. This and other historical evidence support the Protestant argument that the collection of 39 books they accept today (although divided and arranged differently) is what was accepted by the Jews of Jesus’ time.

For further reading:

“How and When was the Canon of the Bible put together.”

“How did we get our Bible?” (Focus on the Family)

“Is the Bible Reliable?” (Article adapted from Kathy’s book “God’s Truth Revealed.”)

Sources for this article:

An Introduction to the New Testament, D.A. Carson, Douglas J. Moo, and Leon Morris (Zondervan: Grand Rapids, 1992)

Encountering the Old Testament, Bill T. Arnold and Bryan E. Beyer (Baker Books: Grand Rapids, 1999)

Introduction to Biblical Interpretation, William W. Klein, Craig L. Blomberg, and Robert L. Hubbard, Jr. (Word Publishing: Dallas, 1993)

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