Do Not Depart

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Our Mothers, Part 2

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Mentor and Friend ~ Kristi Stephens

Kristi with her mom and sister

I’m so thankful for my mom! She has always been a wonderful mother, and I treasure that as I’ve grown older she has become a dear mentor and friend to me, as well. I love that when my mom and I talk on the phone, our time is often equally split between updates on the children and what we’ve been doing in ministry.

I so admire my mother for how she is actively mentoring younger women in their church, teaching God’s Word, and lending guidance to younger female leaders around her.  A little part of me is jealous that I’m not in their church benefitting from serving there alongside her, but I’m deeply grateful to call her my mom! She is a Titus 2 woman – and I pray that I will be like her as I grow older, not just in phrases I hear myself saying as I raise my children, but also in the godly pattern of her life.

Just Like Mom- Sandra Peoples Photobucket
I have spent my entire life hearing that I look just like my mom. People would say, “You must be Thresia’s girl.” There were times I didn’t always appreciate this (especially since I grew up in a small town in Oklahoma where news got back to your momma about what you had done before you even got home)! But the older I got and the more I got to know my mom, I realized that any any comment about our similarities is the highest compliment I could ever receive.

My mom is the most kind, gracious, and patient person I know. She gave me a foundation of faith, unconditional love, and support to follow God’s plan for my life. I am thankful for her investment in me. She is my very best friend and I’m blessed to have her just a phone call away!

Lessons Learned ~ Teri Lynne Underwood

Teri Lynne and her Momma

My momma is one of the most creative, loving people I know.  When she loves you, it is with her whole heart.  Growing up I don’t know that I really understood how deep her love for me was … but as an adult, in my moments of deepest fear and hurt, it was mom’s comforting embrace and willingness to sit with me, silently holding me up, that I began to grasp the depth of her love for me.

Not only has my momma taught me to love, she has also taught me to persevere.   Her life has been filled with challenges from being a teenage wife and mother and having a child with a birth defect to losing her mother while she was in her 20s to managing life in while married to a pastor of small church.   There have been times she has questioned her faith and questioned her purpose, but she has never once given up hope.  I’ve watched her fight for the best for her children and her marriage and I’ve watched her learn to surrender her hopes and dreams and fears and failures to the Lord.

My momma is one of the strongest people I know … and also one of the tenderest.  She loves me, my dad, my brothers, our spouses, and our children fiercely.   If, as an adult, my daughter is as thankful for and proud of me as I am of my momma, I will truly be blessed.

Our Mothers, Part 1

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Discerning and Wise ~ Kathy Howard

Kathy and her Mom

My mother has always been an incredible judge of character. Now, I recognize her uncanny sense as the spiritual gift of discernment, but when I was a teenager it just annoyed me.

Whenever I introduced her to a new friend she never failed to give me an evaluation later. She always shared her wisdom with tact and love, but when I was in high school I did not want to hear anything negative about my “best friend” of the moment.

Mom never pushed or insisted that I stay away from a particular person. But she did stick close and continue to gently advise. Then when one of those friends showed her true character, Mom always comforted me and helped make things right. And I don’t ever remember hearing her say, “I told you so.”

I’ve tried to follow her example with my own children. I’ve prayed for wisdom to guide my three in their own friendships. I’ve offered a shoulder to cry on. And I’ve really tried hard not to say “I told you so.” Unfortunately, I’ve failed with that one a time or two!

Blessed with Two ~ Stephanie Shott

Stephanie with her Mom and Grandgirl

I left the hospital room with a friend that day and glanced back at my mom. Her weakened condition was only surpassed by the strength of her resolve. We made our way into the elevator where a gentlemen smiled as he said, “Don’t forget Mother’s Day this Sunday. After all…you only have one mother.”

As the door opened and he exited the vertical tram, I smiled at my friend and said, “Well, I’m blessed with two.” The one who loved me enough to choose life for me and put me up for adoption, and the one who raised me and loved me as her own.

That was last year – when my mom was still with us. That was last year – when I could still hold her hand, see her smile and hear her voice. But my mom is with Jesus now.

Steph with her Birthmom and Grandgirl

My birthmom is still with us as she struggles in her own battle with cancer.

My mom has given me a heritage of strength, resolve, hard work and the grace to quietly and courageously walk through difficult times trusting God.

My birthmom is leaving a legacy of a sweet, meek and gentle spirit. She’s a woman of prayer and a woman of faith whose life challenges my own.

Most daughters are blessed with just one mom – I’ve been blessed with two. And I’m so thankful for the life lessons from both.

A Mother’s Garment ~ Julie Sanders

Julie and her Mom

Shopping for winter coats, I found a chocolate one with cream colored ski stripes, just like the ones I saw girls at school wearing. No one had to know mine was on sale or that it was missing the fancy tag inside.  Sporting my fashionable coat, I had to wonder why my mom kept on wearing her worn out coat that was so out of style. In fact, I noticed that she didn’t even look for a coat for herself, and I concluded that when moms get “old,” they lose their sense of style and desire to have the latest ski jacket.

The coat was perfect timing for the snowy winter we had, including all the days we missed school and went sledding, instead.  I remember my mom wearing her thin coat,  while we sported our slope-ready outerwear. It wasn’t until I grew older and had children of my own that I finally figured out why Mom was willing to wear the old coat. She was a woman of priorities, and she knew divas don’t make a good mom. While she wanted to look nice, to dress attractively, and to be her best, when resources were tight and a choice had to be made, Mom didn’t put herself first.  Motherhood and divas don’t mix well.

Like the Proverbs 31 woman, she was not “afraid of snow for her household” (v. 21), because she had prepared us in the best way she could. Clothed in “strength and dignity” (v.25), she looked “well to the ways of her household” (v.27) and worked hard to make what we had go as far as it could. Meeting the needs of others meant someone had to serve and be selfless, and Mom was willing to be that servant.

My brown ski jacket went out of style a long, long time ago, but Mom’s selflessness and her priority of caring for others has endured. Her self sacrifice is a “garment” she challenged me to wear as I became a mother and one I’m honored to put on, even without a cool stripe.

~*~*~*~*~*~

What attribute of your mom’s character are you most thankful for?

Imperfect Mothers

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I am not a perfect mother. I love my children and I even dare say I am a good mother, but I have made mistakes. Thankfully, God – in His mercy and power – continues to use my meager sacrifice of parenting to work His purposes in my children.

Photo from Visual Bible Alive

Rebekah, the wife of the patriarch Isaac, is one such mother in the Bible. Imperfect? Oh yes. Used by God to work His perfect purposes? Most definitely. Yet so often we dwell on her mistakes as a mother and fail to note the good and positive aspects of her life. I don’t like it when that happens to me, so today I thought we’d give Rebekah another look!

We first meet Rebekah in Genesis 24 when Abraham sends his servant back to his homeland to find a wife for his son Isaac. Rebekah’s appearance at the town well and her kind service to the servant were direct answers to the servant’s prayer for divine intervention. (See Genesis 24:1-27.) Abraham’s servant had no doubt that Rebekah was the young woman God had picked out for Isaac.

Here, in our first meeting with Rebekah, her actions reveal her character and her faith. First, she showed kindness and hospitality to a stranger. Then she expressed a deep faith in Abraham’s God through her willingness to leave everything she knew to become the wife of a man she had never met (Gen 24:58). God blessed Rebekah’s trust and obedience with the deep love of her husband. (See Gen 24:67.)

Later, pregnant with Jacob and Esau, Rebekah worried when the two babies started a civil war in utero. Her first reaction was to pray. And God answered! His response to Rebekah included some information that was outside the cultural norm – the older brother would serve the younger one. (See Gen 25: 22-23.)

Unfortunately, both Isaac and Rebekah played favorites with their twin sons (Gen 25:28). One boy for Isaac. The other boy for Rebekah. That old sin nature reared its ugly head. And parenting is one of its favorite spots to show up. Unfortunately, favoritism continued to plague Rebekah and she pushed Jacob into tricking Isaac into giving him Esau’s blessing. Perhaps she rationalized her actions by recalling God’s words to her when she was pregnant. “The older will serve the younger.”

The rest of the Jacob and Esau story clearly shows that God’s purposes were fulfilled in these two brothers. Jacob fathered the twelve tribes of Israel. Esau’s descendants became a great nation that God used in Israel’s history. All this part of God’s wonderful, incomprehensible plan.

All of us, even mothers, are susceptible to sin. Rebekah was no exception. You and I are no exceptions. Even mothers much more godly than Rebekah will show favoritism, give bad advice, make wrong decisions, act out of selfishness, or lose our temper. But God in His sovereignty will not be surprised when we fall. Our sin cannot derail His purposes for our children. He will continue to work through us – even as He continues to work on us!

Have you made parenting mistakes? Do you wonder how God will ever work things out for your children? Will you express your trust in His mercy and power today?

Mother of all the Living

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There’s a reason why little girls hoard stuffed animals, women want to hold babies, and stray puppies see a bulls-eye on a female of any age. In Genesis 3 God broke the news that life would be hard, even ugly, since God’s plan was rejected.  Adam had named Eve “woman,” because she was taken out of man (Genesis 2:23). After their sin, he gave his wife a new name:  “Eve,” meaning “Mother of all the living” (Genesis 3:20). This name means “life giver” and is a clue that all women would follow Eve as caretakers for life.  Our times pose challenges to this calling, but it’s more important than ever that, as women who follow Jesus, we love and look after “life.” 


In recent weeks we’ve watched people around the world and in our own nation experience profound suffering due to natural disasters. As the world groans, people need women to offer the kind of tender care woven into the fabric of who we’re created to be.


Recently, abortion rights language changed to “a woman’s right to reproductive health and a woman’s right to privacy.”  Some states have legalized assisted suicide. Legislation is underway to withdraw protection for end of life and beginning of life care. Privately, economic pressures have prompted increases in domestic violence. The greater the pain, the greater the need for the Eves of today to love and nurture life.

Google Imagesrture life.


Eve fell into the trap of questioning God’s goodness. The sin she shared with Adam trickled down quickly, as their own son Cain took the life of their Abel. Her mother’s heart, the heart of a life giver,  must’ve grieved for the lost life of her boy, but it must’ve also grieved for their sin that brought suffering into the world.  A close look into the eyes of those near us and into the images of destruction proves that natural disasters and personal needs stir the need for women to minister to the living.


Life in our world is under attack.  God loves life.  As Creator, life glorifies Him. Jesus conquered death to make way for life.  Our world must see that we not only love and value life, but we’re willing to step up and protect it. More than ever women of God, “Mothers of all the living,” need to be champions of life! 


How do Christian women deal with the causes of the ill, aged, unborn, suffering, and vulnerable?

  • Teach our daughters to love life; practice with her stuffed animal or that stray puppy.
  • Be an example of a woman who reaches out to the frail and physically weak.
  • Respond with love to needy children, hurting adults, and unwed or overwhelmed mothers.
  • Reach out to those affected by disaster.
  • Pray for our lawmakers, and voice your love of life when given opportunity.

Let’s ask God to use us to love life on His behalf, and be ready to act on that love.

How are you being a “life giver” to people near you?

Has God used a woman in your life to be a nurturer in your life?

Jochebed: Mom of Protection

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“By faith Moses, when he was born, was hidden for three months by his parents, because they saw that the child was beautiful, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.” Hebrews 11:23

Jochebed’s story is a short one, but her legacy lasts through the generations. She inspires us all to be moms who protect our children. Just watching the nightly news reminds us that our world is a dangerous place. Protecting our children from every threat of danger may seem impossible. While we can’t protect them from everything, we can give them a firm foundation. We can be mothers of protection. Elizabeth George writes, “Jochebed shows you how to hold up your frightening, seemingly impossible situations to your Father in heaven.”

Jochebed’s story is set in Egypt where the descendants of Abraham, the Hebrews, suffered as slaves. Although Joseph had wielded power and influence in Egypt, time had passed and the new pharaoh “did not know Joseph” (Exodus 1:8). In other words, he had no reason to protect or even respect the Hebrews. He did take notice of them because their numbers were growing–growing so fast that he decided to make their lives miserable. Hard manual labor, harsh conditions, and demanding taskmasters were part of everyday life for the Hebrews. But they continued to have children so Pharaoh took drastic measures.

The pharaoh ordered all male Hebrew babies be put to death. They were to be thrown in the river. One Hebrew couple, identified as descendants of Levi, disobeyed the pharaoh’s orders. When this wife, Jochebed, had a son they hid him from the pharaoh for three months. It took great courage and faith in God for Jochebed to protect the life of her baby. But as he grew I’m sure he became louder and more active and was harder to hide. So Jochebed built a small boat and sent her sweet baby floating down the river, with big sister Miriam following the currents.

(image via Microsoft clip art)

Jochebed would agree with pastor and author David Platt who writes, “God creates, blesses, and saves each us of for a radically global purpose.” If she didn’t believe that God had a plan for her children, she would not have risked her life to protect Moses.

Even if you didn’t know Jochebed by name, the next part of the story is probably familiar to you. This baby was taken from the river by Pharaoh’s daughter. He was named “Moses” because he was drawn out of the water. Little Miriam offered to call a Hebrew nurse for the baby. She went, of course, to the baby’s own mother. Women at this time often nursed their children for three years. Though Jochebed didn’t have much time with her young son, she must have taken each precious minute and used it to its full advantage.

Jochebed not only protected baby Moses from death, she also protected her other children Miriam and Aaron. They were growing up as slaves in Egypt, and in order for them to stand firm as adults, they needed a solid foundation of faith that included protecting them from the pagan culture around them.

Scripture tells us that Jochebed protected her children because she was not afraid, “By faith Moses, when he was born, was hidden three months by his parents, because they saw that the child was beautiful, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict,” (Hebrews 11:23). Their protection empowered Moses to be unafraid. “By faith he left Egypt, not being afraid of the anger for the king, for he endured as seeing him who is invisible,” (Hebrews 11:27).  

Protecting our children does not mean we make them fearful toward the world. Protecting our children ensures that no matter what our children encounter, they will have the foundation they need to overcome obstacles and follow God’s plan for their lives.

(If you’re interested, you can click over to my personal blog for more I wrote on Jochebed, one of my favorite biblical mothers!)

Biblical Mothers

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May brings longer sunny days, fragrant flowers, last days of school, and one of my favorite days of the year–Mother’s Day! For the next weeks here at Scripture Dig we will be profiling biblical mothers. We will look at the good and the bad in the lives of these moms, learning from their examples. No mom has ever been perfect, but God uses each one of us in His perfect plan.

We look forward to having you study with us, and hope you join in the conversation in the comments, on Twitter, and on our Facebook page!

(picture of Sandra with her boys, taken by Lucky Horseshoe Photography).

The Beauty of “So What”

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“You have been saved!” (Eph 2:8) So what?

I asked that question a month ago when we started our series on Ephesians. The answer is not insignificant. Of course, there are the eternal benefits: If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, He has saved you from an eternity of torment separated from God and saved you to an eternity of joy in God’s presence. During the first half of the month we delved into the nature of our salvation. Here’s a few of the highlights in case you missed them:

But the “so what” of our salvation is not limited to God’s one-time saving act on our behalf and the inheritance we will receive when we get to heaven. Our salvation also matters right now in this earthly life. The wonderful truths that God saved us and that the Holy Spirit lives within us impacts every relationship, every decision, and every circumstance of our lives. That is a great big “SO WHAT!”

Here are some of those “so whats” we discussed this month:

Believer, you have been saved! You have been saved to experience an abundant life in Christ for all eternity and for right now!

How does your salvation affect your life today? I would love to hear your “so what” story!

The Word is Our Weapon

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“And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God” Ephesians 6:17
Photo from Photobucket

Yesterday, Kristi explained the armor of God and challenged us to be Battle Ready because the stakes are so high and our families are at risk.

Today, we’re going to examine the Sword of the Spirit.

An unseen battle rages on around us. It’s a battle for the souls of those who do not know Christ. It’s a war against the faith of those who do. But the battle is not only going on around us – Romans 7:21-24 tells us that it wars within us, as well.

In 2 Timothy 2:3-4, Paul compares the Christian life to that of a soldier in a war as he calls us to endure hardships as a good soldier. And the best way to become skilled in our line of duty is to learn from the Master.

In Matthew 4:1-11, Jesus shows us how to wield the Word of God as weapon when the enemy comes against us. When you read through these verses you find that the enemy waited until Jesus was at His weakest point physically before he tried to tempt Him.

He didn’t try to tempt Jesus with food when He had only been without food for a day or two. He lurked behind the scenes until he thought He could catch Jesus in a moment of weakness and then he pounced. That’s how he operates…attacking us when we’re weak.

Jesus met each fiery dart with the Word of God.

He was tested in the same three areas we are: (1 John 2:16)

The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life.

For Christians, the invisible battle that rages on around and in us is designed for our destruction. The destruction of our faith, our testimonies, our influence and ultimately our effectiveness. Winning each battle requires diligence. It’s not an easy win when the enemy, the world and our own flesh fight so hard to raise their banner of victory over different areas of our lives.

Let’s take a look at some of the packages our attacks come wrapped in:

  • Wrapped in what we think are our biggest needs (After 40 days without food, Jesus’ need for food was real – but He knew that real sustenance comes from the Word of God)
  • Wrapped in religion (When the enemy tempted Jesus, he misrepresented the Word of God. He tried to attack Him at the core of His belief system. But Jesus rebuked him with what the Word of God really said)
  • Wrapped in a shiny “You Deserve This” package (The enemy tried to tempt Jesus with power and possessions, yet he was foolishly offering Jesus something He already owned)
Sisters, we are in a war, but the battle is the Lord’s. Our role is to stand as we wield the Word of God in order to slice and dice every wayward thought – every circumstantial attack – every deceptive lie – every hurtful word or deed – every fleshly desire and every doubt and fear.

The battle is hard. We get weary in the fight. But God’s Word not only protects us, it refreshes and strengthens us as well.

Today, I want to encourage you to arm yourself well. Yes…God has given us His Word, but it is our responsibility to read it, to study it, to memorize it, to meditate on it and to really know it.

Good soldiers keep their blades sharp and are always ready for battle. Are you? Do you have some sharpening to do? Which tool do you need to use to sharpen your blade…studying, memorizing, meditating or all three?

Battle ready

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Photo credit: Simon Howden

I’m not a fighter by nature. I don’t like conflict, confrontation makes me slightly queasy (literally), and I would rather ignore issues than address them head on. But friends, whether we want to recognize it or not, we are standing at the front lines of a battle that has been raging for thousands of years. The question is not if there is a battle, but if we are prepared for the deadly battle that already rages around us.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. (Ephesians 6:10-12, ESV)

On Monday I rocked my sweet four month old baby in the quiet of his nursery. I kissed his fuzzy head and smelled his milk breath and prayed over him, pondering what our crazy world might be like when he reaches adulthood, if the Lord should tarry that long (and I pray He doesn’t!) I long to wrap him in protection from head to toe, guarding him not just physically but more importantly, spiritually.

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. (Ephesians 6:13)

The image of the armor of God came to my mind as I prayed, and it struck me anew how Paul’s description of this spiritual armor speaks so vividly of the readiness we must have for the very real spiritual war that rages around us each day. Our Heavenly Father’s love for us goes even deeper than my love for my little ones – and He wants us to be wrapped in battle-protection, as well.

Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth… (Ephesians 6:14a)

Paul is relying on imagery of a Roman soldier’s battle gear in this passage, a familiar sight to his original readers. The soldier’s belt was far more than a fashion accessory – the soldier would tuck the flowing edges of his tunic into the belt to keep from becoming entangled and tripped up in hand-to-hand combat. Truth – both knowing and clinging to the truth of God’s Word and living authentic lives without hypocrisy – girds about us and keeps us from becoming tripped up and entangled in this raging war.

…and having put on the breastplate of righteousness… (Ephesians 6:14b)

The breastplate was like a bullet-proof vest, Roman soldier style! It covered the vital organs of the torso, providing necessary protection in battle. As we hold tight to what is right and flee from what is evil, it becomes a safeguard around us.

…and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. (Ephesians 6:15)

The footwear of Roman soldiers was designed to give them traction and keep them from slipping as they fought. When we are confident that we are at peace with God and maintaining our focus on the eternal mission God has given us, it gives us spiritual stability and protects us from being pushed off course.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one… (Ephesians 6:16)

This word for “shield” refers to a very large shield that would protect the soldier’s entire body, enabling them to crouch behind it and be completely protected from the arrows flying from the enemy lines. Living a life of deep faith and belief in God’s character, Word, and ways is a shield about us, protecting us from the arrows of temptation and doubt and twisted truth that the enemy constantly sends our way.

…and take the helmet of salvation… (Ephesians 6:17a)

Tying in with the Gospel of Peace and the Shield of Faith, having the issue of our salvation settled is the primary protection for us – Satan loves to attack us in this area, and we must firmly put on our hope of salvation!

Tomorrow, Stephanie will explore the Word of God as our offensive weapon. For today, I want us to ponder if we are battle ready. We must each day fasten on the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the Gospel of peace, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation. We must know the truth of God’s Word, cling to His grace, love, obey, believe Him.

As I hold my little ones and pray over them, I pray that God would capture their hearts young – that they would place their trust in Him and cling to Him with all their might. That they would love what is good and hate what is evil, that they would have a thirst for the Word of God and discernment to recognize what does not line up with the God’s revealed Truth. I pray that they would live each day with a deep and settled faith in God’s character, Word, and ways.

We are in a battle, and it rages deadly around us. I do not doubt that my life will not be easy – and my children’s lives might be even more difficult than my own. I must be dressed for the battle, I pray that God will wrap my little ones in the safety of His armor… and I must fight.

“I’m on the winning side of a war that has already been won.”

Coming to the Knock

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This year, as I prepare for Mother’s Day, my parent:child relationships look different. My youngest is taller than I am. My oldest drives herself to school. My mom just brought her mother home from a nursing home. I bought my mom a cute lanyard to hang her bifocals on. We will always be related as parents and children, yet our relationships go through God ordained seasons.

Training up & inspiring to obey & honor

In our relationships, there’s no doubt:  Knowing God and submitting to others gives us peace. Ignoring God and resisting others robs us of peace.  Ephesians 6:1-4 challenges us with more ways to take our love for Christ and express it through yielding to others. The applications hit close to home, so close that those outside our front door might not know.  After addressing husbands and wives last week, today children receive two specific directions.


Obey ~ The word conveys the idea of hearing a knock at the door and coming. This submissive action results from an attitude wanting to respond “in the Lord.” Children come “when they hear their parents’ knock,” because it’s a right response to the Almighty, not based on the conduct of the parent.  God declares this “right,” meaning a righteous act acceptable to Him.  The old Sunday School song is simple, but true: “Obedience is the very best way to show that you believe. Doing exactly what the Lord commands, doing it happily…”

Honor ~ In contrast to the submissive obedience of verse 1, children are told to “honor,” giving reverence reflecting value placed on another person. God assigns parents value in their position, and they are deserving of honor.  God announces a blessing of long life for those who yield to this charge for all children. As we age, our relationship changes from obedience to honor. This attitude doesn’t hinge on the conduct of a human parent, but on the command of our holy God.  


It’s not always easy to offer obedience while in childhood or honor while in adulthood. God isn’t opening the door for oppression or lack of understanding. Instead, He applies the attitude of submission to each family member. Remember that, in the context of this passage, the charge to children follows the foundation set for a husband and wife. As the core of the home, an obedient man and wife create a loving climate.


Since obedience is learned and sometimes hard won, God speaks to fathers about their role in bringing up children.  Even when shaping a rebellious child, fathers are commanded not to provoke their children, frustrating or exasperating them. This may be obvious and aggressive, or it may be the result of nurturing withheld. Either way it’s born out of sin, rather than a reflection of a man’s yielded heart to His own Heavenly Father. God warns against stirring up young hearts to anger and wrath.


Instead, He wants fathers to train, instruct, and lovingly discipline their children, so their minds and morals are nurtured.  When Fathers embrace their role as the loving leader in their child’s life, and when children obey and honor their parents in each season of life, God blesses families with peace.

  • Children:  obey & honor
  • Fathers:  don’t provoke, but bring up

Knowing God and submitting to others gives us peace. Ignoring God and resisting others robs us of peace.  God is knocking and asking us all to obey His call to submit to others out of love and reverence for Him. Let’s answer His call.


In your season, how are you honoring your own parents?

If you have children, how are you helping them know God’s charge to them?


Royal Wedding?

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At the end of this week, much of the world will watch as Prince William of England marries Catherine Middleton at West Minster Abbey.  An app was developed to allow curious people of the world (ahem) to take a virtual tour of the Abbey before the wedding. Barbara Walters released a special about the events, saying “No one does it quite like the British.”  After Princess Diana’s 25 foot long train in 1981, we might be tempted to believe Barbara, but she’s not quite right.  In reality, the world has yet to see a truly royal wedding.


On Friday we looked at the heavenly hope for wives to respect their husbands and husbands to love their wives. The comparison to how Christ loves his church was a key part of understanding how and why, but today let’s take a closer look at what it means to be the Heavenly Bride.

Unlike an earthly husband, Christ is actually able to sanctify his bride (set her apart) and cleanse her by paying for her impurities with his own righteous sacrifice. In comparison, even the earthly wealth of England doesn’t look quite so grand.   The gift of the Bridegroom Christ on the cross makes it possible for the Bride Church to be totally clean and holy, so nothing separates her from his love. He longs to “present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be hold and without blemish,” (Eph. 5:27) and husbands are to love their wives “in the same way” (v.28).

Photo by Shine4Him8Himself.

We glimpse the gift in our “engagement,” but we’ll fully realize the joy when we are united at the royal Marriage Supper of the Lamb. It will rival the celebration just held at Buckingham Palace by Her Majesty the Queen. The Marriage Supper of the Lamb and his love will be hosted by the Heavenly Father

Revelation 19 offers us a glimpse of what awaits the Bride of Christ, the Church, in heaven.

“Hallelujah!For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns.
Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.”

(vv. 6b-9a)

For West Minister’s “royal wedding,” Catherine prepared for months; the world watched with curious anticipation.  When the Bridegroom Christ receives his Bride the Church, will he see that, “his Bride has made herself ready?”  Will we be covered in the fine linen of righteousness?

I’m sad to say I didn’t receive an invitation to royal wedding of William and Kate, and I venture to guess you didn’t either, but we ALL got an invitation to the Marriage Supper of the Lamb.  And even more thrilling, the Father has chosen us to be the Bride!  We don’t know when we’ll be wed to our Love, but we know the wedding is coming, and it’s going to be more than royal; it’s going to be divine.


Are you ready to meet the Bridegroom? 

Love & Respect … Really?

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We were on our honeymoon when we fell into what Dr. Emerson Eggerichs calls the “Crazy Cycle” between a husband and wife. Jeff had worked hard to save, so we could indulge in special treats, but I was worried about spending what I thought might be our last two nickels. Before we knew it, he felt disrespected by his young bride, and I felt unloved by my tarnished Prince Charming. In Love and Respect Dr. Eggerichs says, “Without love, she reacts without respect. Without respect, he reacts without love.”

Perhaps our very nature prompts God to narrow down the key to sweet marriage with a single focus for each in 3 verses to wives and 9 verses to husbands. Husbands are to love their wives. Wives are to respect their husbands.

Image from Google Images/Corbis

The “marriage chunk” (5:22-33) follows the segment Teri Lynne walked us through about how to put on love and the challenge in verse 21 to submit to each other “out of reverence for Christ.”  Without the modern triple space before verse 22, it’s natural to apply submission to the way couples care for each other.

Instead of a power issue, submission is an expression of love for Christ, a willing yielding of ourselves into the “oneness” of marriage. Wives willingly place themselves under their husband’s headship, and husbands respond with loving care.  Is it humanly possible?

The divine relationship of Christ and His bride is the pattern and standard for the give and take:

“the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body … as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands” (vv. 23-24)

The submission a wife offers her husband flows from her heart as a result of following Jesus. She accepts God’s ordained order, since the word for “head” indicates an authority structure.  Some have misunderstood this as a reflection on a woman’s value or voice, but it is, instead, a beautiful offering of her willingness to step under her husband’s umbrella of leadership. This yielding is not to every man or any man, but to HER man. Yielding is part of a loving cycle.

In the love cycle, God calls a husband to love sacrificially, desiring his wife’s best, guarding her purity, and putting her needs above his own. God calls men to love with “agape” love that doesn’t hinge on the behavior or response of the one loved.  Unconditional loving leadership is part of a loving cycle.

As God paints a picture of oneness, He includes a vital detail. Because of the goal of loving and respecting, it requires that a husband leave the headship of his parents’ home and, instead, stick to his wife like glue (v.31). Nothing comes between them, even their families of origin. You can’t “cleave” unless you “leave.”  This gives a husband freedom to lead as the authority of his home, while it gives the wife the space to be loved foremost by her husband and to respect her man as her head. A husband and wife have to step away from their homes to make one of their own together.

If the image of each putting the other above themselves seems like a lofty goal, it is.  In fact this is loving “just as Christ does the church” (v. 29). Knowing about God’s power

“at work within us” (v.20) to help us walk worthy or our calling, even when it comes to wives loving and husbands respecting, we have confidence that we have what we need to walk in love.

Wives are longing to be loved.  Husbands are yearning to be respected. We have the potential to give our beloved what they need most and what our marriage waits for in order to burst into fullness of life. Just as the mystery of how Christ loves the church “is profound,” so is the mystery of yielding married selves to honor our Jesus with love and respect for each other.

Have there been times when you allowed your circumstances to stunt the respect you show?

How do you see your spouse respond with love when you give

unconditional respect?

A Fragrant Offering

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We are Christmas-a-holics at Chez Underwood.  Our attic is full of decorations and we’ve been known to have more than 10 trees decorated for the season.  In fact, last year, we decorated both our house in Georgia and “The Cottage” in Alabama.   I love all the twinkling lights, handpicked ornaments and especially each of our Nativity sets.   My daughter loves the outdoor decorations and putting lights up on the house.  And my husband … well, he loves all of it.  In fact, he loves it so much that our guest room is Christmas themed year round.   In order to keep the Christmas-y vibe alive during the blistering hot summers here in south Georgia, he has invested in scented candles.   The fragrances of Christmas draw you in when you are in that room … the thick evergreen scent melts into the warmth of cinnamon and you want to curl up in the Christmas throws and watch your favorite Christmas movie.

Photo by Teri Lynne Underwood

Scents affect us.   The fragrance of honeysuckle can take us back to childhood summers.  Walking into the kitchen with an apple pie in the oven reminds us of grandmother’s house.   And just the hint of chocolate chip cookies can bring a smile to almost any face.

Scents affect God as well.  Time and again in Exodus and Leviticus we are told that various offerings presented a “pleasing aroma to the Lord.”  Paul reminded the church at Ephesus that Christ’s sacrifice was the ultimate fragrant offering:

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children.  And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.  Ephesians 5:1-2 ESV

As we become more like Christ, our lives too become fragrant offerings to the Lord … pleasing aromas of the sacrifice of self.   Just as Paul gave clear instruction on what we were to “put off,”  he also offers us guidance about “putting on” the righteousness of Christ.

What are these traits that are fragrant to the Lord?

  • Gracious speech – As we put away our foolish speech, we replace it with kindness, tenderness, and forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32).
  • Discerning hearts – We lay aside the covetous desires of the old life and find instead wisdom and discernment about what is “good and right and true” (5:8-10).
  • Thankful attitudes – Pursuing Christ, we move beyond the bitterness and anger of the flesh and instead diligently live in gratitude for the work of the Lord in us and around us (5:19-20).
  • Personal sacrifice – The change is us is best seen as we give up our excess and instead live sacrificially, learning to submit to others and seek their best instead of our own (5:21).

You are probably thinking – much like I am – HOW is this accomplished?  These changes are not small and certainly not simple.   In fact, we are unable to make the leap into these traits on our own.    By the grace of God, we don’t have to do this on our own … He gives us instruction and direction about how to “put on” Christlikeness, how to become that pleasing aroma to Him.

Be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.  Ephesians 4:23-24 ESV

It is the renewal of our minds that changes us!  Not our actions or thoughts or intentions but as Paul shares in Romans, we are transformed  through Him, through obedience to Him, through living for Him.

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual act of worship.  Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.  Romans 12:1-2 ESV

We are called to present ourselves as living sacrifices … Oh that the sacrifice of our lives would be a fragrant offering, a pleasing aroma to Him.

How has God worked in you to renew your mind, to bring you more into Christlikeness?

Don’t Live Carelessly!

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I remember {vaguely!} waking up  the first day of my senior year of high school and thinking May was forever away.  Thoughts of homecoming, senior pictures, prom, and graduation were merely exciting ideas that were yet to come.   I was looking forward to skipping class to go to the lake, being the “boss” of the high school, and enjoying the spontaneity of whatever the next 180 school days held.

My best friend and me at our 20th reunion in 2009.

Somehow, though, my careless attitude about the {very short} months ahead of me wasn’t always the wise course of action.   Decisions had to be made … college applications completed, acceptance letters received, scholarships sought, and I still had to go to class and work some to help offset the expenses of matriculating in 1989.

I have a letter my Daddy wrote me at the beginning of my senior  year:

The days of you living in our home are drawing rapidly to an end.  There never seems to be time enough to tell you all I want you to know.  I love you and I am proud of who you are becoming.  … Know this, there will always be opportunity for poor choices and careless decisions.  But the consequences for those types of things last long after the fun “in the moment” has passed.   My hope is that your life is full of experiences and opportunities you cannot begin to imagine right now.   But more than anything, I pray you live in close communion with Christ.

That’s a wise Daddy, huh?  I’m thankful for him and for my mom who have weathered many storms in my life and watched as I lived carelessly and faced the consequences of those choices.   Because I hear my Daddy’s voice even as I re-read his words written over twenty years ago, I think I hear Paul’s tone as he is writing to the believers at Ephesus:

And so I insist – and God backs me up on this – that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd. … Watch your step.  Use your head.  Make the most of every chance you get.  These are desperate times!  Don’t live carelessly, unthinkingly.  Make sure you understand what the Master wants.  {Ephesians 4:17, 5:17 MSG emphasis added}

Paul, as their spiritual father, longs for them to live in the fullness of God’s plan for their lives.   He gives them counsel about looking like Christ.   Today, we’re going to look at what we must leave behind, put away, as we pursue the imitation of Christ.

Put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires.  Ephesians 4:22 ESV

What are these characteristics of the old self?

Foolish speech … Paul admonishes against lying (Eph 4:25), words spoken in anger (Eph 4:26), corrupting talk (Eph 4:29) and filthy talk,  crude joking (Eph 5:4)

Covetous hearts … Strong warning is offered against not just sexual impurity but also about idolatry (Eph 5:3) and even thievery which desires what someone else has (Eph 4:28).

Bitter attitudes … Specific mention is given to bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander (Eph 4:31) – all of which begin in our hearts and manifest in our attitude and treatment of others.

Personal excess … In Ephesians 5:18, Paul cautions against drunkenness and debauchery.   We must be mindful against the temptation of excess in all areas of our life.

Why must we put off these flesh-clothes?

And give no opportunity to the devil.  Ephesians 4:27 ESV

Remember, our enemy prowls about like a lion seeking that which he can devour (1 Peter 5:8)… we need to remove the bait from our hearts and minds and lifestyles.  We must not live carelessly!

Tomorrow, we’ll take some time to explore what we are to “put on” as we seek to become more like Christ.

How have you seen the effects of living carelessly in your life or in the lives of those you love?

The Oneness of Us

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Image from Photobucket, Text Added

It’s hard to examine the biblical call to oneness without first considering the Lord’s prayer for His followers found in John 17…

“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word,  that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” John 17:20-21 (ESV) 

It was the cry of Christ’s heart that we would be one with Him and one with one another just as He and the Father are one. It’s an unmistakeable, unshakeable, unchangeable oneness that exists to resonate the reality of Christ to the world.

As you read through Ephesians 4:1-16, you find that Paul’s call to the Ephesian church echoes the very same heart of oneness.

In Ephesians 4:4-6, Paul stresses the eminence of oneness inherent to the Christian faith as he stresses that part of God’s call to walk worthy is the consistent pursuit of unity.

Since there is one body, one Spirit, one hope, one Lord, one faith, one baptism and one God and Father, then it only stands to reason that part of our DNA as Christians should be the obvious manifestation of the oneness of us.

The problem is we are all flawed and fallible people with different personalities and backgrounds. In fact, Paul’s call to oneness falls in context with his reminder that God’s “grace-gifts” were given to each of us according to His own choosing. Those varying gifts that make us unique are the very things God uses to demonstrate the oneness of His body.

When we are unified, yielded to and walking in the Spirit and fully functioning in our giftedness, the body of Christ becomes like a well-oiled machine producing Christlikeness as a testament to the world that we are His and He is Lord.

Ephesians 4:13-16 tells us that our unity develops and demonstrates the following:

♥ MATURITY – “until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ”

♥ STRENGTH & WISDOM – “so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes”

♥ LOVE – “Rather, speaking the truth in love” “when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love”

♥ SUBMISSION & TEAMWORK – “we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly”

Unity is how we grow…it’s how we function as a body! We’re all on the same team. Not just the local church, but the church of God as a whole. We accomplish more when we work together hand-in-hand, side-by-side – cheering each other on and impacting a world for Christ.

Colossians 2:19 says we are knit together. As one body we are woven together like threads of a beautiful tapestry. Each strand holds its own unique color and texture, but when laced together with the others it becomes a stunning work of art. Our giftedness, our races, our cultural and even denominational backgrounds add beauty to the body of Christ. When the body of Christ is unified it’s like a beautiful work of art displayed in the museum of life.

Our unity – the oneness of us – validates our love for one another and communicates Christ in us to a lost a dying world. Our oneness is an answer to the Lord’s prayer!

As we examine the oneness of us today, I can’t help but wonder if anyone reading this is struggling in a relationship with a brother or sister in Christ. If that’s you, please get that thing right today.

What are some ways disunity can hurt the cause of Christ? 

Do you struggle with unity with other believers because of differences or difficulties?

What are some ways to deal with disunity in the body?

Walk Worthy

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photo by Teri Lynne Underwood

I watched her walk away … eleven years old and so sure she could do it on her own.  I remembered other times she had walked away – her first day of school, off to spend the night with a neighbor, across the parking lot to meet her friends.   Often I remind her as she’s going someplace, “Don’t forget who you represent.”  I want my daughter to realize that her life reflects on her, on us as her parents, and on Christ.  I want her to walk well … to walk worthy.

Paul wanted the same thing for his spiritual children in Ephesus:

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called.  Ephesians 4:1 ESV

What does this worthy walk entail?  How is it that we pursue this noble task of living lives that reflect the greatness of the sacrifice Christ gave for us?  As I instruct my daughter what I expect of her, so too Paul outlines what it is to walk worthy of this great calling in our lives.

Our Attitudes {Ephesians 4:2, 31-32}

Ultimately, our attitude should be the “same as that of Christ Jesus” … rooted in humility.  Paul instructs us to function “with all humility and gentleness” in Ephesians 4:2.   As believers we are expected to be filled with a humble spirit and called to repent from attitudes such as bitterness, wrath, anger, and slander (Ephesians 4:31)  Rather, our attitudes toward one another should be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving (v. 32).  Why?  Because “God in Christ forgave you” (v. 32).  Walking worthy demands a humble heart that is given to kindness and gentleness toward others.

Our Actions {Ephesians 4:2, 29, 5:21}

Behavior is the result of the attitudes of our heart.   We cannot claim a humble spirit and then live self-seeking lives.  Our actions will reflect what is inside us … what motivates us, what controls us.   If we are controlled by the Spirit, our behavior and actions will show it.   Paul gives specifics about these actions in his letter to Ephesus.  In verse two we find that we are to be patient, bearing with one another.   The idea here is “patient endurance even when others have inflicted pain or suffering” (Women’s Evangelical Commentary, 551).  This isn’t about not complaining when the line at WalMart moves slow, this is about extending grace when someone hurts you, not retaliating in kind.  Paul instructs later in chapter four that our speech must build up, “that it may give grace to those who hear” (v. 29).  Did you catch that?  Our words must give grace not just to whom they are spoken, but also to anyone who hears them.  And we are called to submit to one another (5:1).  This submission is rooted in “voluntarily giving up your own rights and bowing your own will to another (WEC, 561).  Our actions – including our speech – must be others-oriented if we are to walk worthy.

At this point, you may be asking the same question my daughter likes to ask, “Why?”   Why does it matter? 

Again we use Paul’s own words:

[Be] eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.  Ephesians 4:3, 30 ESV

We walk worthy – in attitude and action – because it draws us  together, unifies us in the Spirit of God.   This “bond of peace” is found when we live out the words of Christ from John 13:34, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (ESV).

The best way we walk worthy is to live in unity … treating one another with grace, speaking to each other with kindness, loving each other as we have been greatly loved.

In what ways do you struggle to walk worthy? 

How have you seen your attitudes affect your actions in this area?

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