The Gift of Community

Our Christmas Tea series continues with one last post. Joining us today as a guest contributor, is Cheri Novak.

I’m not sure how many hours I logged as a child in Judy Jones’ kitchen. Whether it was eating her pickle and peanut butter sandwiches after school or preparing a stuffed pork loin with her daughter, a professional chef, I was the honorary sous chef and official taster. During the time I shared in her kitchen, I tried new things, learned the importance of a properly seared protein, and the sheer joy of a simple scoop of ice cream.

I also learned about community and the give and take that it requires. Community building is not always easy work, but the work is never wasted.

Community Defined

When you’re a pastor’s kid, like me, church becomes a natural, built-in community. I didn’t have to work very hard to find it. There was always someone in the church who was available for the preacher’s kids.

Judy was one of those people who was always available for my sister and me. When I ran errands with Judy, I noticed that whether we went to the wallpaper store, the window repair store or the post office, there was always someone who stopped us to talk. Most of these folks weren’t people I knew from church. Instead, the people we talked to were part of Judy’s extended community and with whom she had shared her love of God.

I learned that community was found inside and outside of the walls of the church and it took work to develop.

There is a special love between those who comprise our tribes. The ones who love us and care for us at our very best and in those sacred moments when we are at our very worst. Sometimes we are the giver and sometimes the receiver. When we are having parties, it seems fun and easy to be in community. When we are facing divorce or death or a crisis of faith, it is hard. But in every situation, it is always a gift.

This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. –John 15:12-13

Community Developed

I went to Taylor University after high school. On day one, I met my roommate, Robin. Little did I know then that she would marry one of my dearest hometown friends. Together, Robin and I would amass a tribe of girls (eight of us altogether). During college, we grew to know and love each other as family. Many bonding moments were shared at Ivanhoe’s in Upland, Indiana, over a “Cookie Smash” – a huge cookie topped with a giant scoop of ice cream and hot fudge. It was the sort of sundae you could eat whole in your 20s, but it would require 8 spoons now!

No two girls in our tribe of eight are alike, but we have held each other through the years in some of the most sacred hours that we could know. Last week, all eight of us were on a Zoom call. It has been 30 years since we first met at Taylor, but the root of our bond, formed in a community of faith, remains. We laughed and giggled and shared our joys and heartaches as if no time had passed.

Community Uncovered

After college, finding that deep sense of community has not always been easy. I have made several moves and I have lots of friends. However, relocations and the reality of life often make finding local community a challenge. A little over a year ago, my husband, Mark, and I experienced a deep, unexpected loss. Seemingly out of nowhere, in the void of that loss, a tribe began to form right in our village. While it seemed to happen on its own, the community that we found came from our yearning and our willingness to give and receive grace. This year, in addition to our lingering grief, we were dealt the body blow of an unanticipated health crisis. Our local friends have shown us Christ in unexpected ways and the value of His community has been underscored.

Despite (or maybe because of) the quarantining of 2020, our tribe continues to grow. On Christmas night, a few of us gathered for hot cocoa and cookies. When I surveyed the surrounding joy, I couldn’t help being deeply thankful for God’s gift of community.

As we look toward 2021 and our homebound reality lingers, we anticipate that a larger circle of community will form. I hope you will join me in identifying new members of your tribe and finding the ones with whom you can share and receive Christ’s love in the new year.

“Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.” – Romans 12:9-13, NIV